Who are the biggest bums in Boulder, CO?


(Originally published on 5/15/2014).

By Max R. Weller

Read Boulder worries about being a ‘homeless magnet’ in the Daily Camera. Quoting from it below:

Boulder should find ways to invest its human services money that will make a dent in homelessness, but without making the city even more of a magnet for homeless people from around the region, City Council members said Tuesday night.

“Nobody wants to hurt someone who is down on their luck, but whether we’re drawing more people to our city is a question that needs to be answered,” Councilman Macon Cowles said in comments that were echoed by other council members during an update on the city’s human services strategy.

Intake data released by social service agency and day shelter Bridge House last year showed that more than half of the people who sought help there had lived in Boulder less than six months.

A homeless man sleeps next to Boulder Creek near the Boulder Public Library Main Branch on Friday, May 9, 2014.

A homeless man sleeps next to Boulder Creek near the Boulder Public Library Main Branch on Friday, May 9, 2014. (Mark Leffingwell / Daily Camera)

The answer is simple! Require valid photo ID showing a Boulder County address from any homeless person requesting shelter/services. You might even require additional documentation to prove residency in Boulder County for at least a year. This is the practice that has been adopted by Haven for Hope in San Antonio, TX.

If Bridge House and Boulder Shelter for the Homeless refuse to get on board with the new policy, cut off all funding from the city taxpayers. The city could then pursue condemnation of the so-called homeless people’s day center at 1120 1/2 Pine as a Public Nuisance and a heightened police presence, both day and night, around 4869 N. Broadway. I’d bet if a police dog trained to sniff out illegal drugs ever entered either facility it would go apeshit. Time for law enforcement to take off the gloves . . .

Continuing excerpt from article:

Councilman George Karakehian said he has become friends with a man who is working hard to get out of homelessness and is now on a list for transitional housing. That friend told him how easy it is to “game the system,” Karakehian said.

“I believe we’re far too easy in admittance into our system than other communities are,” he said. “We should give a nod to locals. I hate to see someone who starts in Denver and comes to Boulder and then goes to Greeley and then back to Boulder take the spot of someone who is from here. We are somewhat of a homeless magnet, and I am concerned we will not get ahead of the curve because the more services we provide, the more homeless come.”

C’mon, George, admit it: you’ve been following my blog! About time, too . . .

Now, to the point of this particular post. Who are the biggest bums in Boulder, CO? Oh, puhleeze! The individuals who run local nonprofits are, in fact, tasked with raising the maximum amount of funding from both public and private sources. That includes Isabel McDevitt at Bridge House, Greg Harms at Boulder Shelter for the Homeless, and others. They’re glorified beggars, nothing more.

Educate yourself by reading this book: Bowling for Bums: My Life as a Charity Whore. It’s available to be checked out at the Main Branch of Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe.

Furthermore, the City of Boulder should conduct a performance audit to determine exactly what positive long-term results — if any — are obtained by city taxpayer support of Bridge House, Boulder Shelter for the Homeless, etc. Such an audit should also seek to determine the cost to the city of all of the support being given to transients who have no ties to Boulder, CO (other than drifting here to no good purpose).

At this point, I’ll remind everyone that the Homeless Philosopher is NOT without compassion. I strongly favor providing transients with the $5 bus ticket on RTD to Denver (and a police escort to the Transit Center at 14th & Walnut), along with a couple of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and a bottle of water to-go.

I tell it like it is, and would challenge McDevitt, Harms, et al to debate the issue of homelessness in any public venue at any time.

I won’t be holding my breath. They’re not only bums making a living off the suffering of others as they practice the creed MORE HOMELESS PEOPLE = MORE MONEY, they’re supported by many local do-gooders who don’t have enough sense to pour piss out of a boot.


Addendum 10/8/2015:


Renee McLaughlin gets all of life’s necessities for free here in Boulder, CO — and uses your cash donations to buy cigarettes, rotgut vodka, and marijuana.

Now, you can see her for yourself, and more


By Max R. Weller

Renee McLaughlin panhandles at the intersection of Canyon Boulevard and Broadway in Boulder on Tuesday.

Renee McLaughlin panhandles at the intersection of Canyon Boulevard and Broadway in Boulder on Tuesday. (Jeremy Papasso / Staff Photographer)

The City of Boulder has NEVER enforced the law in re Aggressive Panhandling, so how do they “suspend” enforcement which doesn’t exist? Only in Boulder!

As to Renee herself, read my earlier post: The wild critters are more respectful than some homeless people from 9/22/2015. Excerpt below:

Speaking of the barely human devils, consider what I encountered yesterday after returning to my neighborhood in the noon hour: I was sitting there in front of the Mexican restaurant eating my lunch, watching one of the white male pedophiles panhandling on the corner of U.S. 36, and I happened to look to the north along the sidewalk which leads towards the Dakota Ridge neighborhood. I was wondering how many of Donna’s Drunken Crew were camped out under the pine trees (on private property belonging to the HOA, where they routinely trespass); I saw an alcoholic homeless woman named Renee — her Real Name — squatting like a dog to take a piss right there on the sidewalk, in full view of any business owners, workers, customers, or nearby residents who might have glanced in her direction, as I did. Renee gave me the finger as she took a leak.

Right across the road, on the CDOT lot, is a port-a-potty that was offloaded on Sunday. It’s very conveniently located for the use of all the pickled idjits who want to hang out in this area, but Renee was too drunk and/or too lazy to cross the road and make use of it. She’s also too disrespectful of other people, as well as herself, and that’s what I told the silly [rhymes with “witch”]. I know many homeless women, and almost none of them would pee on a sidewalk in public as Renee did, then try to excuse her misbehavior by saying, “Men can whip it out anywhere when they need to pee — because I’m a woman you’re saying I can’t.” In fact, the homeless men are almost always very discreet, and have been using this port-a-potty the past couple of days.

Anyway, I left Renee and all of Donna’s Drunken Crew with the impression that I was going to call and report this incident of Urinating in Public to law enforcement. I don’t have a cell phone, nor do I want one, but they didn’t know that. As I went out to the corner to play the role of Sober and Humble Beggar, they all decided to make themselves scarce. They headed southbound, at the slow and unsteady rate of inebriates everywhere, probably to continue partying and passing out underneath the bridge over Four Mile Creek at N. Broadway & Rosewood.


Renee, this is where you go to pee.


Read Following backlash, Naropa withdraws application to kill Boulder prairie dogs in the Daily Camera. Quoting from the article:

Naropa officials have said all along that they never intended to kill the prairie dogs, which reside on 2.5 acres of land near 63rd Street and Arapahoe Avenue. They say they have spent four years and $100,000 researching non-lethal options for removal.

Despite that, the university came under fire from prairie dog activists, who pointed out a contradiction between the university’s Buddhist values and its lethal control permit application.

In a Daily Camera guest opinion piece, Todd Kilburn, the university’s vice president for business affairs and chief financial officer, wrote that the school will work with the Prairie Dog Coalition of the Humane Society of the United States to explore relocation options.

Prairie Dog Heaven seems like a good spot to me, and here’s how we can help the VARMINTS get there: Rodenator.

Does any rational person really believe that 50% — or even 30% — of homeless people are veterans? One of my neighbors living in Dakota Ridge in north Boulder does (fortunately for her, I agreed NOT to use anyone’s name in a blog post based on recent online conversations back and forth concerning the bum issue there). This resident wrote:

“While I thought we were dropping the issue I brought up under Max’s heading seems like Max wants to continue. National Coalition for the homelesss reports that “130.000-200,000” Vets sleep on the streets every night. I too have looked at the homeless situations here in Boulder up close by putting in a fair amount of time at the Homeless shelter, talking with hundreds of homeless Vets on the streets in D.C. and here in Boulder. Interacting with many Vets at the Dayton Ohio VA. And whether it is 50% of the people I have talked with on the streets of Boulder and in the Homeless shelter who are Vets or if it is 30% still too many.

“HUD has reported that homeless Veterans rates have dropped 7% over the last few years. A great thing.

“What I was trying to interject into the conversation that Max started with concerns about safety for this neighborhood which makes good sense was some compassion for often broken people. Compassion”

Here is the best available documentation about the number of homeless vets in Boulder County as a whole: Metro Denver Homeless Initiative 2014 Point-in-Time Highlights. Scroll down to page 32 to see “2014 PIT Highlights.” This shows a total of 850 homeless people in Boulder County (surely an undercount), with only 48 of them self-reporting as veterans. My calculator arrives at 5.6% of the total homeless number being veterans. Bear in mind that some of those who self-reported were lying for various reasons (SCAM ALERT: Homeless Vet Dying of Lung Cancer Needs Help from July of 2013), and the true percentage of honorably discharged military veterans legally entitled to VA benefits must be less than five percent.

The 2015 PIT was much less comprehensive, and contained no specific data on veterans.

I learned some time ago that it’s a waste of time and effort to attempt persuading people like this particular do-gooder, who ALL seem to have such an emotional investment in their mistaken beliefs. Imagine, if 50% of the 850 homeless people counted in Boulder County, CO on a January night in 2014 were veterans, that would be 425 vets on the streets! Using the lower figure of 30%, that would still mean 255 homeless vets in our county. This is NUTS! It serves no good purpose to allow ourselves to become so deluded . . .

Here’s what another Dakota ridge resident said:

“I agree with Max and love reading his blog and Facebook entries.”

It’s good to have a neighbor possessing common sense . . .

Drunken child molester now using wheelchair scam at N. Broadway & U.S. 36


By Max R. Weller

Be advised: Austin Gibson now has a longer beard and looks much older.

He arrived in my neighborhood yesterday afternoon with his friend, Donna (a short Native American woman), who paused briefly to go behind a dumpster next to The Amazing Garage Sale and defecate on the ground there (I observed just enough to draw this conclusion, and it’s a wonder I wasn’t struck blind). Then they continued their slow, staggering way to my spot on the wall in front of the Mexican restaurant. These two pickled pals had been gone since the first of the month, when both received their disability benefits from Uncle Sugar — at least $1,500 combined. It’s entirely possible that the entire amount has already been squandered in drinking, drugging, and partying in a motel for a few nights.

Austin was pushing a wheelchair, and he said to me, “Look at my new ride, Max!” It did indeed look brand new. Right away, I knew these two scam artists were planning to use this wheelchair as a prop to gain sympathy and CASH from passersby on the corner of N. Broadway & U.S. 36.

Austin walks as well as I do even when he’s intoxicated, perhaps better than me when he’s sober, and the Homeless Philosopher gets by with a cane.

There wasn’t a darn thing I could do about it, legally, when these two barely human bums started their panhandling — Austin in the wheelchair, Donna pushing him up and down the median. I did yell more than once, “STAND UP, YOU FAKE!” It had no apparent effect on anyone, and I resolved to blog about the incident this morning in hopes that word will get out about these phonies.

To me, this wheelchair scam is almost as bad as “Homeless Vet Dying of Lung Cancer Needs Help” back in July of 2013.

Maybe someone will offer to give Donna a break, and push Austin in his wheelchair. Preferably, right out in front of an 18-wheeler:


Thunderstorms and heavy rain over the weekend


By Max R. Weller

As I’ve preached for years, you’ve got to be prepared with the right kind of gear if you’re going to sleep outdoors comfortably in all kinds of weather. I enjoyed Nature’s display of thunder, lightning, and rainfall. I did so with a 6’x8′ tarp as a ground cover, a zero degree-rated sleeping bag as a pad on top of that, a comforter as covering over my fully-clothed body, and a 9’x12′ tarp (staked at the corners) over everything. I rolled up my light jacket to use as a pillow, not needing it for warmth. The tarps I buy at Walmart are two-sided, brown and silver, and I make certain that the reflective silver surfaces are on the inside of my camping “sandwich” to help retain the body heat I generate. There is condensation to deal with, because one’s breath contains water vapor, but it’s a minor issue if you cover your head with the comforter; a few drops of cold water in the face when it’s time to get up is refreshing, anyway.

The gentle patter of raindrops became more like a drumroll at times on Saturday night, but it was nevertheless restful to me as I stayed warm and dry.

See the National Weather Service forecast for the next few days.

During daylight hours on both Saturday and Sunday, I retreated into my burrow to read The Mammoth Hunters by Jean M. Auel. I’d read this novel before, and I acknowledge that it’s trash, but at times there’s very little choice of reading material at Boulder Shelter for the Homeless and other times I’m not inclined to spend up to $10 for a new paperback at King Soopers. The trysting of Jondalar and Ayla reads like a how-to manual for horny teenagers, but I’d imagine it might provide a script for role-playing by bored couples:

In reality, the humans of the Ice Age probably smelled like mammoths, themselves. Our modern-day Jondalars and Aylas should refrain from bathing or using deodorant for several weeks to achieve the proper state of fragrant arousal.

It’s what homeless couples do in the bushes along Boulder Creek Path, anyway . . .

Boulder Shelter for the Homeless will be serving a hot breakfast every morning from now through April 30th. I confess that I’ll be taking along any leftover fried potatoes in a GladWare container in my backpack, since this staple food is otherwise not available to the Homeless Philosopher at his campsite.

That’s all for now, folks.

Boulder Shelter opened last night, and (almost) nobody came, and more


By Max R. Weller


I was quite surprised this morning, when I entered Boulder Shelter for the Homeless shortly after 6AM to throw yesterday’s clean laundry in a dryer and take my morning shower: it seemed that there was no noticeable increase in the number of homeless people inside, consisting mostly of the program residents who are there on a year-round basis (a few of them year after year). Typically in the past, most transients haven’t had enough common sense to save their allotment of 90 nights of sheltering (any 90 nights between now and April 30th) when it’s warm and dry outdoors overnight; the first bunch of bums is finished in January, and then has to stay in Boulder Outreach for Homeless Overflow or go back to Denver.

Speaking of BOHOhere’s some info about their partners. Quoting from the web page below:

Boulder Mennonite Church suffered damage and stepped out of the hosting rotation for the 2013-2014 season. They are exploring new options for support.

It’s hard to understand why a bunch of ungrateful, drunken louts would vandalize a church which is freely offering them a refuge from life-threatening weather conditions outside. I’ve heard that a few other congregations have just about had enough of the bums’ bad behavior. BTW, I have NEVER stayed at an Emergency Warming Center and can’t imagine being desperate enough to tolerate the idiots who flock there. Having said that, I acknowledge that a civilized society should attempt to keep people from freezing to death on the streets . . . Here’s BOHO’s Facebook page, where you can find info on EWCs on nights they are open.

More on Tiny Houses: Read about Dignity Village in Portland, OR.


Looks like it could use some more work, but it’s certainly better than any homeless shelter to be found here in Boulder, CO! 

Note: If the moron who left a comment on my blog — to the effect that I should move to either Eugene, OR or Madison, WI (two cities where Tiny Houses for the homeless are encouraged) — is reading this, don’t bother to do so again. It won’t be published.

Tonight at my campsite: Hormel canned White Chicken Chili, with Keebler Club Crackers.

Transient advisory: New rules at Boulder Shelter for the Homeless*


By Max R. Weller

Boulder Shelter for the Homeless at 4869 N. Broadway in Boulder, CO opens its men’s and women’s emergency overnight dorms tonight, October 1st, with intake from 5PM until 7.

New rules include:

All those who can show valid photo ID with a Boulder County address will be allowed to participate in the lottery for available beds for FREE; all others must pay a $5 fee to draw a number. Nobody is guaranteed a bed.

Registered sex offenders will not be accepted as overnight guests. NO EXCEPTIONS.

All backpacks, bags, and luggage of any kind will be inspected during intake for prohibited items such as weapons, tools, alcohol, non-prescription drugs, etc. All those caught with prohibited items during inspection will be turned away from BSH for the night; if caught with prohibited items inside the facility, the result will be permanent expulsion.

Everyone who gets a bed will be assigned a chore to help keep the facility clean and in good order; failure to complete the assigned chore will result in a one-week ban from entering BSH for the first offense. A second offense will carry a 30-day ban. The third offense will result in permanent expulsion from BSH.

Profane language and/or disrespect of any kind towards other guests or staff will result in a one-week ban from BSH. Progressive penalties, as listed above, will be applied for further offenses.

There will be NO FREE BUS to and from 4869 N. Broadway. However, overnight guests are strongly encouraged to leave the neighborhood during the day. Bad behavior in the neighborhood will be treated as disrespect, with the same progressive consequences listed above. Staff will be “out and about” during the day to ensure that homeless guests are on their best behavior in the immediate vicinity of BSH.

The First Step and Transition Programs will be phased out through attrition; no new clients will be accepted.

Due to the infestation of Giant Mutant Bedbugs in this facility, a bounty of $1 will be paid to any guest for each bloodsucker killed and turned in to staff.


Actual size


*Of course, these “new rules” are simply wishful thinking on my part . . . As for the Homeless Philosopher, I’ll continue sleeping outdoors or with friends in their homes under special circumstances.

No mystery about another homeless man drowning in Boulder Creek, and more


By Max R. Weller

See the latest update: Family of Boulder man, 22, found dead in creek: ‘He had his whole life in front of him’ in the Daily Camera. Quoting from the article below:

The Boulder County Coroner’s Office identified the man found in the water near the Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., as Paul William Sanchez.

The coroner will conduct an autopsy to help determine the cause and manner of his death.

A passerby noticed Sanchez floating on his back in the middle of Boulder Creek near the library Monday morning. Boulder police do not suspect foul play.

[Sanchez’s cousin, Steven Burton] said Sanchez most likely was living on the streets (emphasis is mine — MRW), noting he was an outdoor kind of person who loved playing sports and “never sat still and was always active.”

The homeless lifestyle is NOT conducive to a long life expectancy, and is fraught with all sorts of dangers. We can hope that this young man is allowed to rest in peace now, and his unfortunate death won’t be exploited by the usual suspects (see below) seeking to promote an expansion of the local homeless shelter/services industry.

Speaking of one of the devils, has Joy Eckstine Redstone decided to quit her new gig as a DC columnist? Her only column to this point, about suicide, was published on 8/11/2015:


I’d like her to write about her twisted relationship with convicted rapist Jim Budd, and offer a PUBLIC APOLOGY for her role in promoting this sociopath to the extent that she did — first at Carriage House/Bridge House and later at Boulder Outreach for Homeless Overflow. Joy might also offer a sincere expression of sympathy to Budd’s victim, who worked as a volunteer at CH/BH.

Please, don’t hurt the feelings of Boulder City Council members:

Read the DC’s report: Decrying ‘vitriol,’ Boulder council decides Folsom will return to 4 lanes. Excerpt below:

Boulder City Council members criticized the community for the vitriolic tone of emails they had received from both sides of the “right-sizing” issue, before backing a transportation staff recommendation to remove protected bike lanes and return to four lanes of vehicle traffic on four blocks of Folsom Street.

“It’s hard to go to sleep at night because you’ve been insulted so badly,” Councilwoman Mary Young said Tuesday night. “I feel like I’m living among a bunch of people who feel entitled to their own without consideration for others. I want you to think about that.”

Councilwoman Lisa Morzel, who pushed for the city to roll back the right-sizing project, said the tone of the debate had set back the cause of bicycle infrastructure, and she criticized bicycle advocates dressed in black who were tweeting about the meeting from the front row.

“My concern with all this vitriol is that it pushes everyone into their own corners and it pushes us backwards, and we can’t make progress on bike and pedestrian safety,” she said.

But Morzel rejected the idea that the city is “abandoning” the Folsom project.

“That is not the case,” she said.

Boulder City Council members (except for George K.) brought this on themselves, and now they’re crying because citizens are outraged? WUSSES! Grow a thicker skin, Mary Young; Lisa Morzel, your image should be on the $3 bill . . .

Tonight at my campsite: ham salad with crackers.