More ‘room’ for the cyclists in Boulder, and other stuff

A LITTLE MORE ACCOUNTABILITY, A LITTLE LESS ENABLING

By Max R. Weller

Read the story in the Daily Camera: To make room for bikes, Boulder to test fewer vehicle lanes.

Joe Wilson, left, laughs as Jason Burton kills time popping wheelies while waiting in the northbound lane of Folsom Street at the Arapahoe Avenue

Joe Wilson, left, laughs as Jason Burton kills time popping wheelies while waiting in the northbound lane of Folsom Street at the Arapahoe Avenue intersection on Monday in Boulder. (Paul Aiken / Staff Photographer)

What Boulder’s cyclists really need are taxpayer-funded doping stations, staffed by nurses ready to assist the Lance Armstrong wannabes:

I envision small kiosks at strategic locations all around Boulder, where cyclists could swipe their credit cards before dropping their spandex pants and bending over for the shot of juice . . .

My friend R. stopped by at my spot on the wall in front of the Mexican restaurant in the 4900 block of N. Broadway yesterday afternoon. He brought me a couple of books, “The Boys in the Boat” and “Seven Summits” — which will keep me occupied for the next few days. I must add, R. always makes it a point to include a $20 bill as a bookmark in each book he gives me; this is most welcome.

I appreciate all of my friends and acquaintances in this north Boulder neighborhood, where I’ve lived for over seven years, who are kind enough to say hello in passing. This contact with Real People from the Real World is vital, to keep me from becoming a raving lunatic in the company of the worst-behaved bums. It’s why I counsel other homeless people to leave behind the transient rat packs and bum hangouts like Bridge House — nothing good can come of that degrading lifestyle, and the Real World is filled with opportunities to better oneself in various ways.

This story from the New York Times is worth repeating, and it seems to me that Boulder’s taxpayer-funded Ready to Work program (run by Bridge House) should adopt the same policy:

Amsterdam Has a Deal for Alcoholics: Work Paid in Beer

What? You don’t really think that the Ready to Work guys and gals are clean and sober now, do you? LOL!

h5y9r

Send your donations of BEER to Bridge House at 1120 1/2 Pine in downtown Boulder, CO. Help the thirsty bums from Denver and elsewhere; it’s the compassionate thing to do!

That’s all for now, folks.

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